I'm actually writing the beginning of this blog from the discomfort of the gym exercise bike I don't actually advise working whilst trying to work out as I believe your not really being 100% productive on either task so it's pretty pointless... However today I really had no choice having worked the Sunday and visiting London clients today there just isn't enough hours in the day.... So here I am in the gym blogging....
Works been crazy busy these last few weeks, mornings have had to start earlier to fit in these workouts around clients I upped my cardio and spent a lot more time working on my abs and using the free weights as well as the weight machines. I finally got my mojo back, thanks to an old friend who introduced me to pre/work out. Completely changed my life..... I flew with the unicorns just what I needed, to help me workout away from reality... he saved me from hitting that wall again. It got me over that wall I had seemed to have hit when my weight plateaued. I was working out harder and more determined than ever. I even extended some of my time in the gym to an occasional two hour session or one hr sessions twice a day. I was determined to lose something these last few weeks as I had been seriously slacking in previous. I still managed to socialise and enjoy my food, but made sure I had burnt it off before any calorie consumption took place.
My figure is really changing I am getting a bigger bum ( it got shut I'm the doors or the underground tube, and surprisingly it didn’t hurt due to the extra padding.) must be my( 100 squats a day) and bigger boobs... I can't complain I highly recommend the chest weight machines to achieve this effect... I'm going to do a little flash back to the 90s here... who read Judy Blume's book “ Are you there God its me Margret”. I'm sure you ladies in your late 20s early 30s remember that book. Every time I'm sitting perched on those chest machines trying to look elegant .,,"we must we must we must increase our bust" I have a little silent giggle to myself trying not to catch eye contact with anyone. If there's one inspiration to go to the gym this surely is it....
Heart smart completely changed my life. Having been told to stop working out a few years before my operation, I had forgot how much I loved exercise..., (groan) no actually I do. I feel awesome after a good pounding at the gym, I can gather my thoughts and get my head straight either ready for the day to take over the world, or clear my mind ready to take on my dreams at night... It really is the best cure for a depressive or insomniac. I have really struggled with my insecurities... They did tell me that following my surgery it would effect me mentally. I didn't believe them. Until now one year on and I can see the issues slowly arising. I always was a shy girl but thought I was very confident in my work and around the people I love. It took me by surprise how insecure about my body I have become. I am also a scaredy cat... For someone that once upon a time threw her self out of a plane at 13000ft.... I am finding it hard to excercise anywhere but within the four walls of the gym.... At first I only felt safe with Mark once a week in the heart smart sessions as he was trained to deal with our issues, now I can go without him. Thats cool I am slowly building my confidence up. Im fine I really am it's just hard to convince myself that I am healthy when the nightmares and anxiety are still fresh and a recurring reminder. But That will ease and I might start taking steps outside of those walls but right now I need the support of the gym and they guys that attend my sessions. I need some more gym buddies, to keep me entertained with more stories and someone to throw me in the pool as I still don't feel safe venturing Into water just yet. Now down to the finer details, has my hard work finally paid off, has my weight or measurements actually changed unlike my last blog. As Mark gets out the scales and tape measure I am more nervous than ever and have really worked my hardest these Last two weeks.
Totally awesomely smashed it!!!! I lost another 2lbs in weight… I'm back on track. Now the measurements. My waist first… “Are you breathing in Hayley”…. No actually I'm not thanks for that Mark. I have spend 15mins everyday just working on my abs. Another 1.3 inches lost, I can feel them now, I am aware of the tightness when I stand. I finally have a core again and just plan to continue to strengthen it to help support the rest of my body. 2.2 inches of my hips, I have been doing a lot of exercises that combine my hips and lower abs together. As I could have predicted my chest has increased by just over 1 inch obviously because of the chest exercises I have been doing. I have finally managed to shift ½ inch off my thighs maybe my leg weights are working. I’m giving myself another three months after America to hit my target, even if I don't lose those stubborn 7lb il be happy with turning that weight into muscle. With broad shoulders and an athletic build I'm never going to be skinny....and I don't want to be, I just want to be healthy and strong.
Inspiration is all around you in the gym how can you fail really... Surrounded by people that have fitness and health as our goals... The "code names" are turning in to real names the smiles are turning into conversations. This is fun I'm making new friends.... We could all do with more of those right?...I would love to let you in on my little code names but you never know who is actually reading my blog these days. Maybe its time for another “ the secret diary of a newly converted fitness fanatic” il leave that one for another day. I am a perfectionist, suffer from OCD and have a highly addictive personality..... There are worse addictions out there I'm lucky mines the gym. I cannot be much happier in my life once I get over my insecurities, these years to come will be pretty much the best years of my life and I'm going to embrace every minute of it. I'm making up for 30 years of just “ feeling under the weather”…. This time I'm going for gold, starting with a road trip up the west coast of America…. Will I be running along the beach every morning in San Diego, rollerblading up Venice Beach sidewalk, bike riding in LA, hiking in Arizona. Find out when I'm back how I managed to stay healthy outside of the gym. I think I going to conquer this fear of exercising out of those four walls…. The adventure is only beginning....
Love
Hayley x